A couple of posts ago I asked a question about pornography and whether people enjoying watching a single naked man or woman. I was curious to see the results because I already had an inkling of what they might be. Just as I suspected it turns out that many (indeed I might even say most) women preferred watching another naked women versus a naked man. Even if they preferred being with a man over a woman in real life. Of course the men also said they preferred women.
I’ve asked questions similar to this in the past. So I believe these results to be fairly accurate. Now the question I ask myself is “why?”
Most of the responses I’ve gotten here or elsewhere indicate that people (men and women) simply feel that the female form is more attractive and that women are more alluring to watch. I’ve even had women comment that they view penises as “ugly”.
So I ask myself “why is it that the female body is more attractive to females then the male body?” One would think that among straight people, men would prefer women and women would prefer men. An equal balance of attractiveness based entirely on your sexuality. But obviously this is not the case. Which only causes me to be more confused. Beyond that, as a man it makes me feel that we men are less desirable in general. If both men and women prefer the female form, then who enjoys the male form? Gay guys it seems. Yet as an ex of mine who had a lot of gay friends once said to me “even gay guys like a good titty pillow to rest their head on from time to time.”
It’s taken me some time to try and figure this all out. I had both a girl and guy friend of mine say to me “women are just more attractive, plain and simple” as if I was being dense in not realizing this. But it’s not plain and simple. There are many questions. Like why, why do both men and women prefer the female form? Where does this come from? Is this based on social standards or is it deep rooted in human psychology somewhere?
Where other people simply accept it without question I on the other hand have clearly not accepted it. I am out to understand it. I want to know why the male form is getting the shaft (no pun intended).
Don’t get me wrong. I understand that many women enjoy the male form and find guys sexy. But the scale seems to be far unbalanced in favor of women.
So what has me all up in arms about this? I’ll tell you why, even if it means giving you a glimpse into my inner workings.
I’ve had some success with women over the years, but just like any quiet moderately attractive guy I’ve often wondered why I never got more attention from women. I’ve walked into bars and clubs dressed to the nines and feeling all sexy and attractive, only to discover that throughout the night I was not approached and those I approached seemed to care less. On the other hand a woman who walks into that same bar in the same condition will have guys and possibly even other women flocking to her.
So it’s taken me a long time but I’ve finally figured it out. Here’s the answer. Women, even if they are quiet and / or their personality sucks, will still be desirable for their sexuality (for their body). Whereas women seem to pay less attention to a mans body and more attention to what he’s saying or doing. So if a mans personality isn’t out there and sparkling, it doesn’t matter how good he looks, he’s not getting any attention from the ladies. His body holds no credit with them the way a womans body holds credit with men and apparently even some other women.
Why is this? Here is why. Women are spectacles and men are spectators. That’s how it’s set up. Women get dressed up to feel desirable and be desired, even if they don’t plan on doing anything with it, they enjoy being the spectacle. They play a game with other women, the game is called “who is the best spectacle.” Tthey compete for the attention of the spectators (men and other women). When they win they can have their choice of anyone. When they realize they’ve been out gamed by another women who is prettier, hotter or just dressed better, they either get jealous and catty and begin cutting her down either privately or to their friends. Or they gracefully admit defeat and say something to her along the lines of “oh wow! I love that dress you look so cute.”
This is all well and good and I’ve begun to understand why my quiet ass standing against the wall with my beer in my hand (looking hot as hell) never got any attention. I was never part of the show, never a spectacle, as much as I thought I was. As a guy, by default my role was already set for me. I was meant to be a spectator. I was supposed to compliment the women and give them all the attention. The fact that I thought I could seek the attention myself by looking good, HA!
This seems unfair to me. Why can the average woman be both the spectacle and the spectator (to other women), yet guys can’t ever be the spectacle? Why can’t an average guys body just get him laid without having to jump though a bunch of hoops? A guy can’t just stand there talking to a friend and have women want to bang the crap out of him by just looking at his ass. Yet this is common for guys. We see a girl with a decent ass and we’d happily want to tap that. Women aren’t like that. This disheartening to guys like myself who want to be the spectacle.
I’ve placed all the players, yet I still have yet to understand why women are more desirable. Why is the male body considered less sexy?
I believe firmly that females are the alpha. That females came before men and from asexual females men evolved. Possibly modern day hermaphrodites are an example of where the human race came from. At some point we probably split into two genders to promote genetic diversity among the species. We know that all humans begin female before being affected by the Y chromosome in the womb, turning them male. Perhaps this has something to do with all of it. Perhaps this is why females are more desirable. Perhaps this is also why more females are bisexual. I don’t really know, it’s just a guess.
This is only the beginning of my research and understanding. There will be much more coming in time.