Girlfriend Issues

It’s not that I have a problem when my girlfriend tells me another guy she met is better looking than me. Well, it’s only happened once. The problem is when I see a picture of that guy and completely disagree. That’s when I have to question her taste. I mean if he looked like Boone from Lost or something I’d be like “Yeah, he’s a sexy looking dude. Just don’t go there.” But when he doesn’t look any better in the face or worse than me in the face, I really have to question what it is that she thought makes him better looking than me. They only thing I could come up with is that he’s more muscular than I am. But the shit part is, whenever I say I want to work out more and get buff, she’s like “no, don’t do that because than every girl will want you.” It’s like yeah, that’s the point, just like you wanted this other guy. You think I want to sit around and be second best? You think it feels good when you tell me some guy with a better body than me is better looking than me but then disapprove of the idea of me getting a body like that?
Either way it doesn’t make him hotter, just means he has a better body… right now.

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0 thoughts on “Girlfriend Issues

  1. know what…youre a good looking guy as is…and know what else…looks mean shit without personality. Dont get down on yourself. Im sure there are a ton of quality women out there that would take you in a heartbeat.

  2. @samanthabecicka – She says she isn’t either. That’s what I don’t get. Because clearly he’s not better looking. He’s on par or worse. Like I said the only thing he has going for him is a better body. But that’s something guys like me can fix.

    @macphoto – It’s not that I’m going to break up with my girlfriend over this or even start a fight with her over it. I just don’t get it.

  3. @samanthabecicka – Well she only met him once, briefly, many months ago. I guess he propositioned her for sex, she turned him down. But my buddy who knows him says he’s not the kind of guy who would say that to a girl, especially one that was crying because she just broke up with her boyfriend.

  4. @samanthabecicka – She doesn’t, I was looking at photos her friend (my buddies girlfriend) took on facebook and he was in one of them. So I just ran across it and turned to my buddy and asked if this was the guy his girlfriend had been living with (and my girlfriend called hot), to which he said yes.

  5. Did she say that she thinks he has a hotter body, or is that your own conclusion after deciding that his face isn’t any hotter than yours?  Maybe she has a different opinion on the relative hotness of your faces.

    Regarding the not wanting other chicks to chase after you, maybe she just feels like you’d be out of her league if you buffed up.  It’s not an uncommon insecurity. 

  6. @just_the_average_jane – “Regarding the not wanting other chicks to
    chase after you, maybe she just feels like you’d be out of her league if
    you buffed up”

    That’s exactly what she thinks, but it’s not true. Anyway after my marriage I told myself I wasn’t going to be “that guy” anymore. I wasn’t going to be the faithful committed guy who is always around only to discover that his girlfriend/wife decided to have a special something with a better looking guy on the side. Seems like those guys are the ones that get all the fun, the hot passionate affairs, the threesomes and the variety while not having to deal with any of the BS of a relationship. But here I am in another relationship and when my girlfriend tells me “this guy I met is hotter than you and asked me to have sex with him” what do you think I start thinking? I start thinking “how did I end up being that guy again.”

  7. Meh, sounds irritating. I’d just talk to her about it. My boyfriend and I point out people we find attractive but it’s not in any sort of threatening way like that sounds. 

  8. Well, the only thing I can think of is that perhaps there are different qualities she likes in men, and while you fulfill a good deal of them, there are a few you don’t. Like, as an example, maybe she likes skinny guys with dark hair and also buff guys with blond hair. It’s not as if finding the first group sexy disqualifies the second group completely. It’s possible to like more than one thing. So maybe, while she likes most or even all of the things about you, physically and personality-wise, maybe there are other things she likes which you can’t be because it’s impossible. Like having two different colored hair.

    Anyway yeah, don’t stress. People like some weird stuff. I know people who seem to have overall good fashion sense, but then like one weird “WTF” thing, like plaid ties or something. Or maybe she’s just claiming to like these guys to see how you’ll react…

  9. I’m back with (hopefully) a more thoughtful/useful comment.
    I don’t know your girlfriend, but my take is that she knows your “hot button” issue, given your experience during marriage and is pushing it to get more attention/love/admiration. Of course she’s getting jealousy/suspicion/lack of confidence instead — all not-so-appealing responses that she produced.  Needless to say, you two need to talk about trust issues and neediness. Hopefully she’ll be a little more sensitive and you’ll both feel a bit more secure in the relationship if you really “talk.” gl

  10. I think the other guy’s hotness doesn’t necessarily have to do with him physically but the fact that he desired her enough to proposition her for sex makes his sex appeal higher if she also desires him too even though she didn’t take him up on the offer but knowing that this other guy has the hots for her puts him in a hotter light. I talked to this average joe guy who was slightly chubby but when we talked, he made me feel wonderful like I was a queen and he had a great personality whereas the hot guys that I talked to were usually conceited and didn’t compliment me as much or paid attention since they think their looks got me hooked but this other guy gradually became more appealing to me and that’s probably how you see the hot girl with the not so hot guy.

  11. Hm, that’s kind of selfish that she doesn’t want you to work out.

    I guess my situation is kind of different, my boyfriend and I openly discuss how attractive others are- we’re both bisexual so we have common ground there and can appreciate the same things.

  12. I used to love having a bf that all the girls wanted. I’m not the jealous type, so it was actually kinda fun knowing that he was only mine even though other girls desired him. 

  13. LMFAO. my boyfriend says every guy i think is attractive is ugly. he says i have bad taste and that he must be ugly as well. hahaha. he is just a jerk. he knows i pick hotties. (:

    i would be offended too if my boyfriend me he thought some girl was hot when she wasn’t. lol.

  14. I have dealt with this issue in the past substantially more than I think reasonable. There’s obviously almost always going to be a tinge of jealousy that will arise if you care about someone but you just have to take their “observation” with a grain of salt if you know that nothing will ever come of it. The best advice I can give is to be secure with yourself instead of worrying about matching up with the next guy in the looks department because if a she is with you then you obviously have more to offer than just your physical appearance. 

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