Dear God

I can’t really complain about my life. I’ve been given a good life with some good opportunities and some wonderful people to share it with. That said my biggest problem is myself. Why do you see fit that I should exist? I’m so back and forth, I suffer from too many problems and I can’t seem to get anything straight.

I know that deep inside me I am a good person. I’ve always felt like you had a purpose for me. Like I was one of your chosen ones. But you already know that. Problem is, I don’t know why. What do you want me to do with myself? You know I’m not a church goer. You know that people see me in a shredded light. So what then?

I’m not sure if you read xanga at all. If you do I sorta hope you don’t read my blog, in which case you won’t see this. But if you do, maybe you can provide some answers. Maybe you can rid me of my fears, calm my mind and fix my personality.

That message you gave me when you showed yourself to me years ago still doesn’t provide me much purpose. I understood the message. It was nice to know. But I don’t understand how I can apply it.

Anyway, what’s been going on with you? Hope everything is well.

This entry was posted in General.

0 thoughts on “Dear God

  1. can you imagine the traffic you’d get if He rec’d this?

    yeah, i have the same issue about knowing that there is a purpose, without know what it is yet, especially when it seems like a lot of other people have felt called to something particular much sooner in life.

    ryc:  i met many people like that since i started working.  how weird.

  2. @musterion99 – I had just finished having sex with my girlfriend at the time. As I lay there I fell into a state between sleep and awake. Suddenly a perfect grey sphere was before me. I got the impression this was God. More like I knew it. As I pulled up and away into the air getting further away, I noticed that it was one of many grey spheres. The impression put upon me was that God felt itself no different or more special than anything else. Completely humble in a way I have never seen. Then I awoke. 

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